Dating Your Husband/Partner

Date night selfie!

I love Warren, he's my fest friend, lover and soulmate. Yet all too easily, that could go to hell! For many couples, it does. I have often wondered why that happens to so many people. Why do so many relationships end in break-up and divorce? The only answer I can think of, is time.

Couples who don't make time for each other resent each other, drift apart from one another and all too often end up playing away from home. Obviously, this isn't true for every case, but for most couples, relationships fail, because they are simply neglected.

A few flowers can make create a romantic space.
Do you have any in your garden you could use?

When couples settle into long term relationships or get married, they get comfortable. They fall into a routine and life continues. The challenge is, getting comfortable without neglecting your relationship or your partner.

Warren works long hours. Sometimes he leaves the house at 7:30am and doesn't get home until after 8pm and is still working on his laptop and/or taking work calls at 10pm. This seriously winds me up as it limits our time together. Yet, once a week (hopefully) we take time to catch up with each other by having date night or if the kids are away, a date day.

Even on date night, we're still on parent duty,
so Appletiser makes a fun alternative to wine.

During these times, we step away from the iPads and computers and other distractions and focus on each other. Either Warren or myself will cook a nice meal, or once in a while we will cheat and have a take out. Sometimes we'll snuggle up and watch a movie or catch up on a series we've been watching, but often we will play a board game or work on another activity - such as building the model engine Warren got for Christmas. Or we will simply just sit and talk over a long leisurely dinner.

Working on Warren's model engine
was a fun date night activity.

With six kids, it is rare that we have a night out, but we don't mind that as there are plenty of things we can do together at home. Our date nights have even included us just sitting on the floor and talking while wrapping up Christmas pressies! It doesn't matter what activity you chose, the point is that you make time for each other, just to be together and catch up with one another.

This weekend, we only had Autumn with us, so we had a date day and took her on her first picnic. We walked for four hours, pushing Autumn in pram, sharing ice creams and just talking. It was a really lovely and non-expensive day out and allowed us a chance to just appreciate being in each other's company.

We have a selection of cute
date night props to add a cosy
feel to the evening.

Other ways we do this are:

A little extra effort, makes
the evening extra special.

Taking ten minutes in the garden together first thing in the morning, just the two of us. We will sit with a cup of tea and talk about what he have on our agendas for the day.

Taking a little time when Warren gets home to sit and talk about our day and any difficulties we've had that day.

Cuddling - Either on the sofa, before I fall asleep on it or when Warren finally manages to wake me up and get me to go to bed. I love just falling asleep, snuggled up together listening to Warren breathe. It feels safe.

Even the simplest of desserts
can add a special touch to
date night. 

Talking on the phone/texting when Warren has a break at work makes the day seem shorter. We'll take two minutes to talk about what we want for dinner or what we want to watch or do in the evening. Sometimes, we just text each other so be both know we are thinking about each other.

St Vals weekend, movie night.

We do all of this, because this is comfortable for us. We want our relationship to be settled and comfortable, but we don't want to be neglectful of each other. We took time at the start of our relationship to form healthy habits and these are what have become natural and comfortable for us.

What keeps your relationship healthy? What do you do on date night? Or is there something else that works for you and your partner to keep your relationship healthy?